Blog Life

What does family means to me

December 20, 2016

I have delayed this post because it is about a topic that is very emotional for me and it is an area of my life where I have gone through some development. 

You cannot choose your family and no one is perfect. Every family has its peculiarities where some are stronger than others. However, they say that blood is thicker than water and when everything seems at its darkest the ones that you can count on is usually your family. Because of the special relationship the family creates they are also the ones that are able to hurt you the most. There is no bigger disappointment to a child then when its family let him/her down.

I don’t come from a rich family and there have been times where we have faced problems. I guess coming from a working class family in Brazil means that the members in the family are not highly educated and the way one got treated by his/her mom and dad is the way they would treat their children. I have learned a lot when I came to Norway since the education level here is a lot higher than in my home country and I realised in what aspects my mom did wrong which actually was hurting for me sometimes. After my dad past away there were some things that happened to me and I guess that I was a troubled child. However, I don’t blame her today since the way she raised me was the way she was raised and I guess that in some way she did not know better. Luckily, Norway has taught me some values so that I have been able to stop this spiral and I prevented this from happening to my children. I guess this was something that I understood first when I was a grown up since when you are a child or a teenager it is easy to see the actions of your family as something they did only to hurt you. However, it was not for hurting me but they did not know better.

( My two daughters and me )

Despite having gone through some difficulties in my childhood I see my family as the most important in my life. They are the ones that I can count on when I need help the most and there is no one who knows me better than my own family. I have forgiven my family for the things in the past and I think that my mom and my grandmother today see the things that they made wrong. I was raised at my mom’s house and my grandmother’s house after my dad past away. I really miss them and it can be hard for me sometimes when they are so far away. I can even cry sometimes when I start to think about my mom, my grandmother and my brother and sisters. They are so kind and I wish that Norway and Brazil were closer in distance. The top priority of my boyfriend and I is to save money for a trip to Brazil as soon as we get full time jobs. He has not met them yet and I look forward to present them to him.

Despite having my family far away I am lucky that my boyfriend’s family have accepted me really well. I guess that I have kind of a dad in his dad and so on and I even call him dad sometimes haha. I have connected with them and we have built some fine memories like last Christmas that we spent at his uncle’s house. Family is something very precious and you should not take them for granted. My family has developed a lot and many of them have actually taken education and we have moved from being a typical working class family to a more middle class family. I am very happy to see my family developing in this way. They are everything to me and I wish them all the best always.

Pictures from World Bike Tour in Copacabana with my mom in 2012 when I was visiting my family! The guy on the picture was just someone I met there and took a picture with his dog haha.. I hope I can visit my family soon again …

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Take care! <3

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No Comments

  • Reply unsaid words August 21, 2016 at 8:48 pm

    No matter where you are ,what you have achieved or how many times you have failed .your family is always going to stand by you ,you will always be the same lil baby as you were born, for them .
    🙂

  • Reply deep August 21, 2016 at 8:53 pm

    I really don’t want to sound like a grammar nazi… But isn’t it supposed to be ‘does family mean’ or ‘do families mean’ ?

    • Reply Roberta Pimentel August 21, 2016 at 8:57 pm

      I need to google it, English is not my native language. Maybe you are right hehe

      • Reply lajuani October 10, 2016 at 1:57 pm

        What does family mean?
        But don’t worry Roberta, your English is absolutely fantastic. You write beautifully and being able to express yourself about such touching and deep subjects, in a language that is not your first is pretty amazing!
        x

    • Reply Roberta Pimentel August 21, 2016 at 9:00 pm

      You where right 🙂 Learned some gramma today 😉

  • Reply owningadogwithanxiety August 21, 2016 at 10:25 pm

    A very nice, heartfelt post. Thanks for sharing, Roberta.

  • Reply Morgan August 22, 2016 at 12:04 am

    Heartfelt nice post Roberta 🙂

  • Reply Grandtrines August 22, 2016 at 1:10 am

    Reblogged this on Still Another Writer's Blog.

  • Reply alvarezgalloso August 22, 2016 at 1:37 am

    Great article. At times is not blood but those who accept you for who you are.

  • Reply alvarezgalloso August 22, 2016 at 1:37 am

    I am reblogging this

  • Reply Vincenzo August 22, 2016 at 2:40 pm

    Education is the basis for a “stable personality” and how you wrote to our parents is forgiven because … the important thing that some chains are broken and are not repeated “mistakes” and suffering. Congratulations warms the heart.

  • Reply Roberta Pimentel October 10, 2016 at 9:34 am

    Reblogged this on Roberta Pimentel.

  • Reply Shiva Malekopmath October 10, 2016 at 9:47 am

    It is the Family that comes first always.
    Be it in Joy or Sorrow.
    So the preference is first to be given to it.
    What it means to YOU it means to ME too.
    Shiva
    🙂

  • Reply roseelaineblog October 10, 2016 at 10:14 am

    A great post Roberta which came from the heart. There is a saying….. when we are young we worship our parents, then we judge them and then we forgive them. Because at the end of the day they are human too. 🌹

  • Reply The_Preacher October 10, 2016 at 10:32 am

    Thus was a passionate post ..families are not chose-able but the only option .
    God bless you for your kind words..you seems to work hard for your family and that makes you the hero your kids will see you for ..wealth or riches cant be compare to family or relationship.. being rich and have no one love or appreciate you is suicidal …i love your spirit and your family.. i wish you will one day visit Africa .Ghana to be precise and i bet you , you will never think of returning home .hahahaha.

    cheers for being a good parent to your beautiful ,adorable Kids..

  • Reply petakaplan October 10, 2016 at 12:53 pm

    This is beautiful Roberta. Many have difficult childhoods as most of us are “victim”to our parents shortcomings and them to theirs and so on. As you noted, the only way to create change is to break the pattern. A very conscious deliberate move. Good for you!! Your girls are adorably cute btw.
    Peta

  • Reply OaktownVibes October 10, 2016 at 3:12 pm

    I love this. I have “blood brothers” that im not even directly blood related to from different races and backgrounds who have been there for me more than my own blood related family. Family is who ever accepts and loves you for everything you truly are. This was amazing.

  • Reply Sheldon Bass October 10, 2016 at 8:32 pm

    It is so good to see how you are developing and maturing by learning important aspects of family relationships. Family Love is like an anchor that can hold you safely through the storms of life. I pray that you and your boyfriend will be blessed in your relationship, and that whenever you decide to begin a family of your own that God will give you the wisdom that we all need—the wisdom that comes from LOVE. ☺ “By wisdom a home is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.” Proverbs 24:4

  • Reply Susan Halloran October 11, 2016 at 8:14 am

    Beautiful and from the heart!

  • Reply alvarezgalloso December 20, 2016 at 3:11 pm

    Thanks for sharing. Family means unity

  • Reply vishal4u December 20, 2016 at 3:56 pm

    Wow you today wrote about your family which for no doubt is a touchy subject. We all know what our family means to us and belive me this is truly a lively post.
    Roberta, I hope you go and meet your family as soon a possible and wish your and your family all the happiness you wish for.

  • Reply TheresaBarker December 20, 2016 at 6:05 pm

    Roberta, what I really enjoy in this post is your willingness to look back at your own troubled times as a child in your family – as children we can’t control much of our home environment – and then, having reflected on your own experience and what your family did, you changed your outlook on your own family (your daughters and you), as well as changing your viewpoint on things your parents did. What courage! 🙂

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