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The imperfection

August 6, 2017

Honesty can be hard when living in a world of perfection where everyone strives for that perfect life which makes us create a bubble-like sphere that we live in. I have focused on relationships lately and that is why I want to dig a bit deeper into that subject. In a perfect world there must be a perfect relationship as well, right? The world would not be perfect if you don’t live in a rosy relationship receiving roses from your boyfriend and making love every night. There are many couples who are afraid to see the imperfection in their relationship because we are so used to the idea of living a perfect life. We tend to create a bubble where everything seems perfect on the outside despite not feeling good on the inside. This will lead to lack of communication which eventually will harm your relationship.

But, what happens when the bubble burst?

If you don’t communicate with your partner on a regular basis many surprises can occur. You are going around daily not knowing how your partner really feels. This is, in fact, the same as not knowing your partner. When you don’t share your feelings and thoughts with your partner you are in a danger of growing apart from each other which will lead to waking up one day realizing that you and your partner are too different from each other. That is the time when the bubble burst.

I guess I was creating such bubble in my relationship. I shared many pictures of Johan and I together smiling, while I was feeling that something was missing in our relationship, but I refused to accept it. I wrote a post for a couple of weeks ago named “no relationship is perfect” which describes the process Johan and I have been going through. We have been facing a 5 years crisis lately which I think occurred because of what this post is about. I did not want to accept the fact that our relationship was imperfect and I tried to cover it by refuse to communicate with Johan and tell him how I really felt. It is kind of strange though, because communication was the primary thing that made our relationship so great from the start. We became best friends because we were not afraid to tell each other anything.

 

Luckily, we discovered that we were living in a bubble soon enough and we have started to base our relationship upon fundamental values such as communication, honesty, understanding, patience and tolerance. These values are making our relationship grow again and we are getting to know each other all over again because of what we missed during our dry period. It is a work in progress since it is hard to reopen ourselves after having shout ourselves down for so long and that is where patience and tolerance come in. We must understand the other part to make this work and accept the fact that things take time. I believe that we will become best friends again and be able to share everything with one another as we used to do before. Realizing that our relationship is imperfect will help us create a sincere relationship where the love we have for each other can grow and develop.

The best is yet to come.

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3 Comments

  • Reply alvarezgalloso July 26, 2017 at 11:53 am

    Nothing is perfect because life is continual improvement. Thanks for sharing.

  • Reply depatridge July 26, 2017 at 1:12 pm

    Great piece from the heart, Roberta.

  • Reply trulyunplugged July 26, 2017 at 6:41 pm

    Your honesty is such a beautiful gift…you provide a down-to-earth example of how easy it is to focus on what we want to see, rather than seeing all that there is. You are right–we can’t pick and choose to see only that which is sparkly and easy on the eyes (the head, and the heart). Love encompasses all…that’s what makes it unconditional. I am thrilled for you that you and your partner realized that you were drifting…and, grasped each other’s hands (so to speak) so that you can ride this crest together. You are right, you will come out of it so much stronger for having done the work it takes to stay on the same page. Congratulations…you are as wise as you are beautiful. Thanks for sharing 🙂

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