This is a guest post by Monica Morgan, a contributor for https://hqessays.com/.
Now, why would we want to do this in the first place? Our emotions are part of our very existence. It’s a combination of our thoughts and body sensations. It’s simply how we feel. Emotions can drive us to act in our day and throughout our lives. It affects most of our body functions. It has effects on our psychological and physiological wellness. We get excited, anxious, sad, happy, mad, and a combination of them all sometimes.
However, there are times when we act our emotions too hastily. Especially if we’re feeling negative emotions, most of the time, we make choices that we regret. This is why we should be aware of our emotions. Furthermore, we should be able to control them effectively.
Don’t react just yet
Reacting hastily especially on negative emotions results into something we regret most of the time. Therefore, hold that reaction. Let your mind take control first so you can discern if you should reveal or restraint. In addition, this also gives you time to think how you can react accordingly.
Let’s say you found out that your significant other cheated on you. Of course, you would feel angry about it. However, before bursting into your anger, take a few deep breaths so you can think better.
Validate your emotions
So, you already paused to think things over. Ask the underlying reasons behind your emotions. This way, you can better understand how you feel, and in turn, have the power to better manage it. Are you frustrated, angry, disappointed, or anxious? Why do feel this way? Then you can get to the next point in this list.
For example, you heard a criticism from a colleague and you suddenly felt different. Ask yourself what is it you are feeling and why. With this, you will figure out how you can respond appropriately.
Identify your triggers
Knowing what triggers your emotions can help you understand yourself better. Is it your friend being late? Is it you partner’s mannerisms? Is it your mother’s persistence? Is it the traffic jam? It can even be more helpful if you can find patterns with what triggers your emotions.
Finding pattern on your emotion triggers can help you think of the reasons behind your emotions. This can even help you figure out if you are being reasonable in how you feel.
A car sped off overtaking you and you’re feeling anger brewing inside. Before you submit to your anger, analyze the situation. Why are you feeling angry about the situation? Is it because of your ego? Was your life placed in utmost danger? Think of the possible reasons why the car sped off. Were you slow? Are you in the correct lane of the road? And if you get angry and shout your heart out, what well would it do? Will the other driver hear you? Wouldn’t it be better to just let things go?
These questions are answerable in seconds after a situation that triggers your anger. In analyzing your emotions, you can have better and more credible basis whether you should reveal or restrain your emotions.
Find an outlet
Arguing with a significant other can become dragging and stressful especially when both of you have been taken over by your emotions. In times when you get a surge of intense negative emotions, there’s a chance you do something destructive be it physically or verbally.
Instead of wallowing into intense negative emotions, find a healthy outlet to release some of it. One good way is writing. With this, you can say virtually anything you want to say without hurting the other person. This can also put a thing into perspective and help you find a solution.
After discerning your emotions and you have arrived at a conclusion that there’s nothing you can do about a certain situation. There’s nothing left to do but change your perspective about the matter. Let’s take the overtaking car example. This could get you mad if you think that the other disrespects you on the road. But if you shift your perspective that the driver must just be late for something and he did not cause you any danger, this would no longer trigger your negative emotions.
Controlling our emotions does not translate to not feeling anything at all or not expressing emotions entirely. Control is being the ability to be aware, to manage, reveal, or restrain our emotions in an appropriate manner. By doing this, we can help improve our well-being.